Karen D asks what if parenting styles and child care styles are very different?
The research on resiliency teaches us that one person can make a significant difference in our lives. What I always stress when I’m working with families where custody might be shared, or parenting styles are very different is that each parent has control of his/her interactions with that child. She/He can choose to discover who has come to live with her/him and choose to work with the child in a sensitive and responsive way. The research does also demonstrate that spirited children need high quality care where they feel emotionally and physically safe and their caregivers are effective emotion coaches. Mary Sheedy Kurcinka
18 comments:
I know that individuals have their own sensitivity level and not everyone has the same or around the same sensitivity level, how do we as educators make sure that we don't trigger those sensitivity levels so a child doesn't want to learn?
I am finding it very interesting to learn about the temperament traits and how we are able to distinguish the levels of each trait in people of all ages. It was very surprising to learn that physical sensitivity is a temperament trait. I would not have guessed reactions to things like itchy tags, twisted socks, and bright lights are triggers to determine a temperament trait. I will certainly look for clues in the future but do you have suggestions as to how to identify when a child's sensitivity level is causing a stressful situation? How do you verbalize this to the child so he can identify whether a physical sensitivity is causing a problem? Thanks! Laura Roos
When I think of temperment I think of a particular child that is at the place of my work. He is 7 years old and not yet potty trained (he wears pullups) and his behavior is pretty much all over the place, lashes out at teachers/students, screams in the hallways for no reason, begging for attention type of things. Does this all link back to the potty training? I'm not quite sure if this deals with sensitivity but when I think about it - to me - i think that he is so sensitive because he's not yet potty trained and all his friends are, or maybe he begs for the attention because he doesn't get it from home? I'm kinda lost on how this child is evolving.
how do you stop a child from picking on another child that is very sensitve when has admitted he does it just to watch them cry.
I have three children and all three of them have different sensitivity levels. My two sons are actually more sensitive to their feelings then my daughter is. Is this common for boys to be more sensitive at a younger age?
I work in Worthington, MN and have had several opportunities to hear Mary Sheedy Kurcinka speak! I've also read her books and have a question that was prompted by reading "Raising Your Spirited Child". In the book, it is mentioned that parents do not make their child spirited -- that there are influences from school, friends, family, etc. as well as genetics. What happens to a child's temperament when there are two conflicting influences? Such as a child's parents having two different styles or the influences at child care being very different than the child's home. What is the impact of these mixed messages, if any? Is there a major source of influence on a child's preferred style of responding?
These are really good questions. Can it happen where a parent tells their child that they are too sensitive and to toughen up, and the child either does toughen up or withdraws or becomes overly sensitive?
What method would you use to soothe a child when she is sensitive and noises around her are too loud. As I was observing in a preschool the other day, I saw a situation in which a little boy was banging on something and a little girl playing near him was covering her ears and yelling "stop it, stop it". Of course the first reaction is to ask the boy to stop banging but what would be a good thing to say to the little girl to acknowledge her sensitive temperament. Thanks! Laura Roos 227
Is there any known reason as to why people are more sensitive to certain things? Nurture/nature?
One of the two year olds I work with is very sensitive, especially when his mom or dad drops him off at the daycare center. Do you have any suggestions on how to soothe him or help him to stay calm when his parents leave? Is there any way to distract him from them leaving?
Should we as educators constantly remind the child of their sensitively when in the classroom, especially when the child is shy and doesn't want to draw attention to themselves?
Should we as educators constantly remind the child of their sensitively when in the classroom, especially when the child is shy and doesn't want to draw attention to themselves? (ECE 150)
Do you ever find that your own temperaments hinder some of your students? For example, I am extremely sensitive and I worry that the little things that drive me crazy will affect the learning environment of my students.
Danielle -- Because temperament is part genetic, I also wonder how much influence a parent's actions have on children's temperament. (ECE 227)
Jen, I have also noticed with some of the kids I have been working with that some of the boys are more sensitive than the some of the girls. I was wondering if boys are less likely to hide their sensitivity at a younger age than an older age? And if they are does this have anything to do with not having to worry whether they maybe made fun of if another boy sees them crying?
I think sensitivity level is one of the most interesting parts of temperament. It is so difficult to try and understand why one child reacts so outwardly to a certain situation, and why another seems to show no emotion or concern. We have a few children at the daycare that I work at that scream and cry at every little thing, and it is nice to finally know why they are that way.
I teach my children that any emotion is ok to feel at anytime throughout the day. Teaching them how to show and act upon that emotion is also crucial to teach as well.
I think learning about temperament has been so amazing this semester. I had to clue there were even formal temperament labels for kids... I just always thought it was mostly due to their upbringing and their parents... Now I will know how to watch out for those more sensitive ones, and understand them and actually be able to help them in a way that they feel comfortable and will be cooperative with!
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